stuck, tired & still dreaming: how moms can grow through it all
MOTHERHOOD
WRITTEN BY CHIDIMMA OLADIPUPO
MAY 13, 2025
It’s not that something big happened. It’s that nothing has moved in a long time. Your dreams are in a drawer. Your spark feels faint. And while the kids are growing, you’re wondering if you still are.
Growing in motherhood can feel like rocket science - or like homework you think you should breeze through, except the more you try, the more it feels like you’re stuck in a maze. Moving through section after section but making no real headway. Everything feels repetitive, exhausting, overwhelming. Stuck.
What’s most painful is the comparison. Why does it seem like everyone else is moving forward, doing ‘something,’ making changes - everyone but you?
We talk often about the physical and emotional changes that come with being a mom. From the small, unspoken surprises to the big ones like postpartum depression, hormonal shifts, mom brain, or health changes that affect our wellbeing. But how often do we talk about the pause; the dreams delayed, the ache of “what next?” that can sit in your chest for months… even years?
In this article:
01 The Ache of “What Next”
02 Naming It Is Power
03 A Gentle Practice: The Stuck Check-In
04 Growth in Disguise
05 Lessons in the Quiet
06 The Invitation Back to You
related articles
The Ache of “What Next?”
Before motherhood, you had big dreams; travel, business, growth, impact. You saw yourself doing meaningful work and making a difference in the world. Now, those dreams feel tucked away in the corners of your mind, not because you stopped caring, but because you’ve convinced yourself now is not the time. Maybe someday.
To the outside world, you have a life worth admiring. But inside? You’re functioning, yes - but muted. Dull. Like someone pressed pause and forgot to come back.
That feeling didn’t arrive loudly. It came in quietly. Over time. Like fog.
“What’s tricky about feeling stuck is that it doesn’t always announce itself.”
Naming It Is Power
What’s tricky about feeling stuck is that it doesn’t always announce itself. It hides in routines, the exhaustion, the mental load. One day, you’re making mental notes for the new year, and before you know it, three years have passed and the same dreams are still sitting in your mind, unbirthed.
Where there’s no vision or action, dreams don’t grow.
So how do we shift from “stuck and tired” to “moving and becoming”? How do we break free from the lies that whisper it’s too late or not your time?
Let’s start with truth:
You are not too late. You are not too old. And your dreams are not too small or selfish or silly.
You are allowed to grow too.
A Gentle Practice: The Stuck Check-In
Sometimes we carry the weight of stuckness without fully understanding where it’s coming from. But naming it helps. When we pause to ask ourselves the right questions, clarity begins to rise. Try this gentle, doable check-in:
Create a “Stuck Check-in” and ask yourself:
“I feel most stuck when…”
“If I could give this season a title, it would be…”
“What part of me have I been putting on hold?”
“What do I secretly wish someone would notice or ask me about?”
“If I had the energy or support, what’s one thing I would love to begin again?”
These questions aren’t for judgment. They’re a doorway. And even just asking them can stir something back to life.
Growth in Disguise
Your kids are growing. So are you.
They’re your greatest reminder that growth takes time. One day they needed you for everything - from feeding to burping to walking. Today, they do some of those things on their own. You didn’t notice every moment of their growth. But it was happening. Quietly. Consistently.
You, dear mom, are in your own becoming season too.
Maybe you’re not stuck - you’re just still. And stillness doesn’t mean stagnation. Stillness is a sacred space. It’s where we begin to notice. To hear. To heal. To prepare.
Lessons in the Quiet
This season may be teaching you something. Maybe it’s discipline. Or learning how to show up when no one sees. Maybe it’s sharpening your patience, your clarity, your sense of what really matters.
You may not feel like you’re moving, but growth doesn’t always look like loud wins. Sometimes it looks like surviving one more day with intention. Sometimes it looks like becoming more rooted before blooming again.
And maybe - without realising it - you’ve grown more confident, more self-aware, more clear. Maybe you’ve built quiet strengths that will serve your next chapter well.
The Invitation Back to You
Your dreams still matter.
We cheer so loudly for our kids, our partners, our friends. How often do we place ourselves in that same front row?
Sometimes, others won’t see how much it matters to you…until you do. Until you go first. And then - almost like magic - they start clapping too.
So maybe today, nothing changes on the outside.
The laundry still waits. The children still call “Mommy” a thousand times.
But inside, there’s a flicker. A shift. A knowing.
That being stuck doesn’t mean you’re broken.
It doesn’t mean your dreams are gone.
It might just mean you’ve paused long enough to begin again.
To listen for what your soul has been whispering:
“Don’t forget me.”
And maybe, for the first time in a long time,
you’re ready to whisper back,
“I don’t have all the answers, but I’m willing to find one small way forward.”
Because being stuck isn’t the end of growth.
It’s the pause before the becoming.
about the author
CONTRIBUTING WRITER
Chidimma Oladipupo is a motherhood writer and storyteller, social media manager, and motherhood mentor passionate about helping moms rediscover purpose and take bold steps toward their dreams. She coaches women - especially mothers - on starting their freelance careers in social media management, equipping them with tools to thrive while raising their families. Through her platform The Mom Conversation, she shares honest reflections, growth-centered content, and practical encouragement to support moms navigating both identity and ambition.
chidimma
YOUR NEXT MUST-READ:
-
![Woman sitting on a couch enjoying sunlight with a cup of coffee near a window.]()
why self-care isn’t about doing more: it’s about doing what matters
WELLBEING
-
![Person holding a large monstera leaf covering their face, wearing large square earrings and an off-shoulder top, against a beige background.]()
share your voice; become a tonic contributor
COMMUNITY
-
![Person lying on a blue sofa with legs raised, wearing striped clothing and pink shoes, next to potted plant.]()
why you can’t have it all — & that's not a bad thing
RELATIONSHIPS
